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That's Thanatastic!

A positive perspective on the subject of death.

15/12/2019

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The Best Resolutions You’ll Ever Make.

 
Fireworks in night sky. 2020.
Next month, roughly a quarter of us will have a New Year’s Resolution; a pact made with ourselves, to improve our lives.
Person using binoculars. Are these the best we can do?
How do we know which resolutions will best improve our lives?

Imagine a day in the distant future. On this one day, you can see the most advantageous paths with greatest clarity.


​Sadly, that day is your last. It’s only with a lifetime behind you, the full impact of many mistakes become obvious.

​By this time, it’s too late.
Fork in road.
​Through her years working in palliative care, Bronnie Ware compiled the ‘big five’ most common regrets of those in their final days.

​Here are the mistakes of those who’ve gone before us. The most-trodden paths leading to regret:
​
  • "I wish I’d lived a life true to myself, not what others expected of me.
    As we start adulthood, we all have dreams. But as our lives progress, those ambitions are often pushed aside. 
    On our one opportunity to be alive, so many of us don't find the time to even attempt those dreams.
    By the time we retire, failing health (our own, or a partner's) means it's often too late.

​
  • "I wish I hadn’t worked so hard."
    Of all those people I've spoken about at their funerals, not one wished they'd worked more. Work is important if we want to support ourselves and our families. But are those constant 60 hour weeks worth trading so much of our lives for?
 
  • "I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings."​
    One I'm particularly guilty of. Too often, many of us value the feelings of others, over our own. This leads us to suppress what we feel, just in case we upset anyone.
    On your last day, which conclusion would you prefer to arrive at: That you were always honest, both with yourself and others; or that you bottled everything up, rather than risk upsetting others with your true feelings?



  • "I wish I’d stayed in touch with my friends."
    In our final days, we don't ask to see our possessions. Rather, we hope to to see our friends, our family. It's only then that too many of us realise: it's our connections that are most important.
    By which time, illness, distance, and our running of time can make rekindling bonds with friends, family, and old flames difficult; even impossible.
 
  • ​"I wish I’d let myself be happier.
    Because we're worried about how others will react, many of us choose to live dissatisfied lives instead, Rather than act on the changes needed to make us happier, we convince ourselves and others that we're fine as we are.
    Those approaching the end of their lives don't worry about the opinions of others.

    ​
    ​Source
Hourglass with red sand. Change now.
​Whatever our beliefs; we all agree that being alive is a precious state; one far too important to waste.

When your final day comes, you'll want a fulfilled life to reflect on. Unless today's your last, there's still time to change:


  • LOOK at those 'Big Five' regrets.
  • IMAGINE what you'll think at the end of your life.
  • VOW to make changes.
  • ENJOY your life more.
LIVE!
Four people with paper speech bubbles. Comments?
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    Join me on a journey to learn more about the end of life, death, and funerals; all from a positive perspective. Every two weeks, a new post will explore this important life-stage; asking what we can learn from those going before us, and how we can apply that knowledge to better our lives.

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